Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
