Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
