I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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