Banned from zoo.
Again?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
