Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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