so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
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