Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
