redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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