just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
