You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I have demons in me.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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