My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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