Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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