Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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