Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
