Having a random hookup so left but love u
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
