New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
