are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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