FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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