Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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