Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize