I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize