You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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