all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Randomize
