C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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