Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
He kissed a someone with a penis
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
