someone get that fucking seahorse.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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