And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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