if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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