i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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