Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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