Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Help. Why am I so naked?
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
