Goodnight sugar queer
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss