does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.