Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
