grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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