She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
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