I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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