nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
someone get that fucking seahorse.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize