Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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