I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Randomize
