This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect