this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.