I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
