that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Randomize