Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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