Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
