In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
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