YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
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