"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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