he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Found your dick twin last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I just blew my weed a kiss
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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