Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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